i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I think I sprained my soul last night
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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