So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
Randomize
