Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
I'm really busy with my period
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