He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Randomize
