Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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