This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
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