Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
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