How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
