Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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