In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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