Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Randomize
