This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Randomize
