Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
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