Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
