Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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