Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
