Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Randomize
