Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
