I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Randomize
