i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
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