i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
I think i peed on brittanys purse
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize
