Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Randomize
