People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Sorry about my life...
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
