Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Cover your peen. We're going out.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
