her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Randomize
