I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Your cock deserves a montage
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
