awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Randomize
