I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize
