In America we eat man semen.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
Randomize