i barfeds in our rink
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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