nut hugger
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
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