Duck Duck Cougar?
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
