is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
I understand Curling. That high.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Randomize
