New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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