were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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