i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
