Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize
