The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize
