this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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