You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
