you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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