i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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