you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
Randomize
