I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize
