he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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