I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Randomize
