absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
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