i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
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