No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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