Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
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