how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
Randomize
