Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Randomize
